


How Predictable

by nuguru



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, K-pop
Genre: Angst, Canon, Established Relationship, Happy Ending, Ish Again?, M/M, Military Enlistment, One Shot, ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-09
Updated: 2015-07-09
Packaged: 2018-04-08 12:55:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4305918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nuguru/pseuds/nuguru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were so predictable.</p>
<p>Yunho enlists in the military, Changmin tries to cope with it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How Predictable

They found out the date in June, but the word ringing through their heads was “July”. Jung Yunho would be enlisting in July. Shim Changmin's leader, best friend, ultimate support system, and quite certainly the love of his life was about to leave him for two years, which was very likely to result in Changmin’s enlistment date appearing around the same time that Yunho was discharged. It was going to be four years until they would be together for good. It was going to be four fucking years without Yunho. He felt like he was going to throw up.

"I'm sorry Changmin, we knew it had to come sooner or later. But, you know, I’m getting so old that we can probably consider this later, huh? It's just my time. It has to happen to all of us." Yunho smiled that stupid all knowing smile and let his hand sit on Changmin's shoulder, squeezing with the most sincere looking sympathy. Anyone looking at him would go on about how strong he was, or how well he was handling things. Anyone who didn’t know Yunho on such an intimate level would be in awe. Right now, it just felt condescending. He wasn’t a child and didn’t need to be treated like one, especially not by someone who was as close to falling apart as he was. Changmin could see right through this act. He wanted to punch him for it.

"No, stop. Don't touch me. Don't even fucking look at me. How long has this been the plan, Yunho? How long was this in the works? Were you just planning on not telling me until it was too late? Fuck this. Fuck you." Changmin spat, trying to channel all of the emotions flooding him into the anger that was simmering, but even he could hear the hurt laced through every word. Unfortunately, he was pretty transparent himself. He made sure that before Yunho could try and calm him down, he was out the door. Yunho didn’t try to follow, but Changmin hadn’t really expected him to.

His phone rang consistently for the first ten minutes after he had left. As he stormed the busy streets with nothing but the collar of his jacket to shield him from anyone that could potentially recognize him, he made his way to a nearby park that was so dry and unwelcoming that it was almost always vacant. It was Changmin’s favorite spot for that very reason. Making his way to an empty bench in the dead center of the park, he felt the calls become reduced to one every few minutes. Finally, after around two hours of numbly sitting on this public park bench, his phone had gone silent. He spent another thirty minutes in silence, staring out over the field of dead grass, waiting for his phone to ring again. When he was certain that he wasn't going to be receiving another call, he pulled out his phone. Thirty five missed calls. Two new voicemails. Yunho was so predictable.

He thought about putting it aside for later, but with the realization that it will only hurt more to reopen the wound, he grudgingly called to  listen to the voicemails that were left for him.

You have two voice messages. First new message.

"Changmin, love. Please come back. I know you're not going to answer, but- I just- I'm sorry. You know I don’t want this. Please come back. This isn't easy for me, this isn’t... Just… come back home. Please. We can talk about this. Don’t shut me out." Beep. Message marked for deletion. New voice message.

"I'm sorry. Just let me know that you're okay. I love you." Message saved. You have no new voice messages. It was exactly what Changmin had been expecting. Yunho was so predictable. The realization didn't do much to ease the pain in his heart.

Apparently he was predictable too, because after he had decided that was enough wallowing (at least, enough wallowing for a public location) he made his way out of the park to see Yunho slowly walking his direction, looking as much like a kicked puppy as a nearly thirty year old man could. He couldn't blame him. Changmin could be harsh, but that was to be expected. They were both getting pretty predictable. When they finally met up on the sidewalk, surprisingly sparse after his few hours of turmoil, Yunho didn't bother to make eye contact. Changmin was thankful. He wasn’t sure he could look him in the eye right now. Yunho did settle his hand on his wrist, if only long enough to ask, "Can I walk you home?"

Changmin didn't respond, only started walking in the direction they had come from. He wasn't angry anymore. He didn't feel like spending his last few weeks with Yunho in anger. He felt deflated, at this point, and just wanted to sleep. The two walked in silence on their trip, the shards of their own hearts rattling around in their chests in unison. Isn’t that fucking poetic. The thought almost made Changmin laugh, but if he opened his mouth to do so he knows that his tears would win the race. Breaking the tension wasn't worth that kind of public indecency.

It wasn't a long walk, and when they got back home, Changmin fell onto his own bed for the first time since they moved in. They had two beds for appearances sake, but they only needed the one. What’s the point in separate beds when every instance of his life had been entwined with Yunho’s since he was a teenager? They were hopelessly in everything together, they had been for a very long time. As Changmin looked up from his bed, he noticed that this action seemed to hurt Yunho more than every word he'd shouted. He scoffed into his pillow. "Come here, idiot. Your bed just feels... wrong, tonight. Just tonight. My bed has no promises. There's nothing..." He didn't need to finish the thought, even if he had known how to finish it. The need to sleep in his bed didn’t make a lot of sense, but Yunho understood. Him and Yunho were in sync like that, or at the very least, predictable like that. He was cradled in Yunho's arms before he could even start another train of thought.

"I don't want to leave you, you know that, right? I never want to leave. I’ve known that I’d have to, but it didn’t feel like a real concern until now. They only told me a week ago. What am I gonna do, Minnie? Four years without you?" Ah. Yunho was well aware of the complication that their minor age difference held. He should have known that he would be. Yunho is always acutely aware of every detail. Changmin was more aware of different kinds of details, like the way Yunho's nails were long enough for him to feel through his shirt as they kept him pressed into his chest. He was aware of how cold Yunho’s tears felt on their impact with Changmin’s skin thanks to the way he needed the air conditioning cranked at all times. He was aware that while Yunho was crying his body was going to refuse him the chance to do the same, the opportunity to share this moment with his loved one, because his body somehow knew that Yunho needed him to be the strong one right now. Changmin was aware of details, and quite like Yunho, he... didn't know what to do with them right now.

"I love you, Yunho. Let's just sleep for now. It'll be easier in the morning. Pretend with me for tonight."

It was hard to pretend when they were cramped in Changmin's bed.

 

\---

 

They still had schedules, at least up until Yunho was scheduled to leave. The company didn't seem to know what to do with Changmin at that point. He didn't mind very much. Maybe he'd have a few days off while they planned out the rest of his life. Maybe those days would be spent with him a shell of a person in Yunho's bed, but those are the sort of details that no one needs to worry about. Especially not Yunho.

They put on their final performance as a duo before the enlistment, and Changmin prayed that the fans didn't see through him. Him and Yunho had gotten good at pretending for the public, and if Yunho didn’t look as close to tears as Changmin knew he was, then he was certain that he must be faring well himself. He doubted the fans could see through their own tears, as it was. The whole thing felt so familiar, and the warmth that he felt for his fans in that moment was going to help him going just a little bit longer. Changmin gave a solo interview, and couldn't stop his honesty when they asked him how he had felt. Empty. They should have known, even if they didn't know the details of their lives (as no one but them should) they should still be aware of how close they are. How was Changmin expected to feel? He didn't really feel like doing any more interviews any time soon.

 

\---

 

Changmin got the news not long before the fans did. Yunho got the news not long after Changmin did. It all happened in the span of a week, at most. He wasn't sure what he was expected to feel this time. Nervous, certainly, excited? A little. Changmin had always liked new experiences, even ones such as this, and his relief at not being an active duty soldier was a little bit of a bonus. For the most part, though, all he could think about was the two years that they were saving this way. He tried not to break down in Lee Sooman's office, because he wasn't very quick on his feet when it came to that man and he wouldn't have been able to come up with a good lie very quickly. The last thing they needed was him tuning in on how much the timing meant to him.

Of course, they still had two years apart. They could write and visit one another, maybe, but it was going to be about two years without Yunho. Changmin almost felt bad about how good that sounded when compared to the four that they were facing, but now wasn’t the time to feel bad. He had to admit, if they hadn't come to him first, he probably would have ended up begging them to let him go anyway.

He still had his own schedule to finish up. There was no certainty in his enlistment at this point, no dates to back it up, no solid information even on his end. He wasn't sure about any aspect of the next two years of his life, and wouldn't be sure of anything until he was reunited with Yunho. It's kind of funny to think of reuniting with the man who is drooling on your chest, but, details. As soon as Yunho had been told of this change in plans, he reverted back to his normal self at a speed that should have been alarming, but was really just quite predictable. Changmin should be irritated by how careless that was, how they really don't have much time to waste being easygoing and should be spending these weeks aware of what is looming over them, but he was never very good at turning Yunho down when it came to things that really mattered. He refused to be the reason for the smile to be wiped from that lovely face. Changmin was predictable, too, after all.

As they fall asleep in Yunho's bed for not the last time, but for one of the last times in a long time, and as they hold one another with the urgency they haven't lost since the first time they kissed, Changmin can't help but think that they're both just a little bit too predictable. He didn't mind so much, anymore.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i dont follow tvxq very closely, so take this with that in mind.  
> this is also the first fic ive ever finished in like, six years of writing, wow, go me.  
> unbetad bc i still dont know what that means lmao  
> ty for reading♥


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